WHY... am I going shopping this weekend?

I went on my shopping trip last weekend without actually having the money to do it with, but I had my paper checks as my representation . I estimate that I spent around $300 because I wasn't counting, just purchasing a few things that I chose to have for myself. Among other things, I'm an independent distributor for an herb company. When I returned home from my shopping spree on Saturday, i saw an $85 herb order in my email and another $30 order on Monday...Note: it takes 3 days for these electronic payments to actually show up in my bank account. Ok, so on Tuesday the thought momentarily crossed my mind that those 3 checks written on Saturday would probably hit the bank between Tuesday and Wednesday, however, i didn't hang out in that zone because I knew that these were old patterns of sub-mind energies. The $85 electronic payment posted on Wednesday, and it was enough to cover the smaller of the checks that I wrote. On Thursday, the other 2 checks hit the bank along with the overdraft fees and I received a payment for $380 enough to cover the checks and fees. And on Friday, I did another $50 cash purchase.

Now this is where I screwed it all up! On Thursday, that $380 payment for me, was made payable to the independent newspaper company that I work. However, I was kind of busy that day, even though myself told me & reminded me several times to STOP, go and take care of this now! I instead passed the check to the owner of the business to cash and asked him to bring me back the cash. He didn't return until 24hrs later with only $195 and says that something came up and he needed to use the rest and will pay me back sometime next week. I wasn't at all upset because I could clearly see what I had done and I created a couple of other situations that I could see from making that decision. I didn't listen to myself and I can clearly see that I have done this same similar thing many times before.

Recap... I had manifested for myself more money than I needed to cover the shopping expenses including for the overdraft charges by Thursday. As a result of not listening to myself, I got to observe, thank, love and delete the creation
of this... (1) My bank account is still -$376 minus
(2) I have 2 herb orders that I have not placed yet and can't use my bank card (I have the $79 in cash for the orders and asked him if I could use his card in exchange for the cash to place the orders...he says NO cause he doesn't want his card out there like that....duh! but shops online often for books, dvds, etc...)

Well, maybe this story will help someone else. I'm on my way to the store to purchase money orders to place these herb orders.

These experiences are ass kickers

WOOOOW!!!! I can not emphasize how I make so many wrong turns by not listening to my inner voice, letting the external dictate things to me when I know I have a pulling on the inside to something differently. The thing to is we always fight with that inner guidance by giving ourselves reasons like well "it's too hard" "I have too much to do", "I'll do it later"...

I had to re-read my own story...it trips me out just thinking about it. But i'm letting it go to re-manifest this money again. If I've learned from this then I won't create something similar AGAIN and will get the chance to do it differently.

Stay tuned!!!

Benita, for my graduation present I would looooove a weekend on your yacht!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've always wanted to swim in the ocean